Brainless

Monday, July 19, 2010

Happy end

My memory allows me to see the same movie and read the same books again and again, ...

... and wonder if there will be a happy end.

Tueday, June 15, 2010

No pretending

My memory is so bad ...

I never have to pretend that I forgot something.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Best and worst

The best things in life are beer, chocolate, coffee, holidays and sex. This was in alphabetical order.

The worst things in life are the labels in the back of my shirts, trousers and underwear. Also in alphabetical order.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Be wise

It's a sign of stupidity to consider yourself wise, ...

... a sign of wisdom to know you're stupid.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Teevee

First we had flat pictures on a three-dimensional TV.

... Now we want 3D pictures on a flat TV.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Balance

There's a fine balance ...

... between wisdom and stupidity.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Networking

In my asocial network, ...

... I have blocked all my friends.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

No limit

Stupidity has no limitations.

... look at me.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Memory in stone

I don't want to be buried. I don't want to be cremated.

... I want to be petrified.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Talk nonsense

When I talk to myself, ...

... I don't listen to the rubbish.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Memory assistance

I forget many things, but it doesn't matter...

... Whatever my wife remembers counts double.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Telling twice

Never say "as I told you before .."

... and you can also skip the rest of the sentence.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Memory lost

My memory is not what it used to be ...

... But I forgot what it used to be.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Solving problems

It takes one to create a problem.

Two to solve it.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Missed calls

"When I try to get through / On the telephone to you / There'll be nobody home"

Pink Floyd 1979. Nobody home in 2010.